"We now go LIVE to The Forum in Inglewood where Martell "Three Scoops" Hauser is standing by with breaking news on tonight's big showdown between two of the West Coast's top ice creams. Three Scoops?"
Cut To: Martell Hauser standing in front of The Forum.
"Walter, the battle between "The Portland Punisher", Salt & Straw's Sea Salt Ice Cream with Caramel Ribbon against Sweet Rose Creamery's Salted Caramel was billed as the first big match of 2014, but, in the end. the Punisher lived up to his name, besting the Los Angeles contender in several key categories, including caramel explosiveness, temptation. depth of flavor, saltiness and balance. A tour de force for Salt and Straw."
Cut to a Close Up : A fork going into the pint of S & S, Portland's much-heralded, now-nationally acclaimed ice cream, slowly twirling amid the caramel ripple and pulling out a white and gold-veined mound of lusciousness.
Hauser, Voice Over - "It was a masterful performance by the Portland ice cream company which started in 2011 by cousins Kim and Tyler Malek. The popular Sweet Rose came out to the wild cheers of locals. but it was clear early on. that, as fine an ice cream as she is, the Punisher was too much."
Cut To Hauser. He walks up to an excited - and clearly drunk - man among the throngs exiting the Forum. "What did you think of the fight tonight?"
Fan. "Salt and Straw was overpowering. Deep flavor! You feel me? Deeeeeep! I think he could be one of the great ones. For a packaged pint of ice cream, I think this coldsta' is going to be hard to beat. The Punisher!"
"Hauser - "Would you like to see a dream fight with Salt & Straw's Caramel Ribbon going against Salty Peanut Butter from Pizzeria Mozza Newport Beach?"
Fan - (Suddenly, subdued, even analytical) "Yes, I would. Any ice cream fan, any gelato fan would, but, in the end, Salty is Formula One. and it wouldn't be a fair fight. But, for packaged Ice cream, i think Salty and Straw is the best thing going."
Hauser - "I agree. Even at $11 a pint. Live from The Forum, this is Martell "Three Scoops" Hauser."
Just as the camera cuts away. a woman in a Sweet Rose Creamery T- Shirt takes a wild punch at Hauser.
Cut To - The Studio and anchor Walter Black. "It's getting crazy at the Forum. I really do like Sweet Rose, but I'll have to get some of that Portland stuff."
Salt & Straw Ice Cream http://www.saltandstraw.com/index.php is getable in Los Angeles at Joan's On Third" ( http://www.joansonthird.com/ ) which is at 8350 W. 3d Street (east of La Cienega and west of Noodles Stories ) in Los Angeles.
Some of the other S & S flavors they might be lined up next to Sea Salt Ice Cream with Caramel Ribbon are Grandma Malek's Almond Brittle with Salted Ganache, Honey Balsamic Cherry with Cracked Pepper, Chocolate with Gooey Brownies and Pear with Blue Cheese. Not that again!
(A good house guest turn me on to S & S's Caramel Ribbon based on a tip for Sarah St. Lifer, the patron saint of prison inmates,)
Sweet Rose's newest store is at 7565 W. Beverly Boulevard, (about a mile northeast of Noodle Stories.) http://www.sweetrosecreamery.com/ A pint here is $9. Ryan Di Niccola, sous chef at Chi Spacca, raves about the Caramel Apple Granola (CAG) ice cream of Sweet Rose Creamery. A possible match between the CAG and the Punisher could be in the works. Many SRC loyalists were upset with the outcome tonight. But, that Sweet Rose's Salted Caramel even went one-on-one with the Punisher, that the match drew a sell out crowd at the Forum, that it was licked, even in defeat, is a statement of its goodness.
Photo taken fro outer space of Salt and Straw's Sea Salt Ice Cream with Caramel Ribbons